Enter A'ilana

Sweet A'ilana was born in the summer of 2002. She had a rocky start...arriving via C-section and becoming colicky almost immediately..9 - 14 hours a day. The poor thing was in terrible agony for months. They moved to FL when she was 3 1/2 months old. They moved to the small house in the small FL town in order to take their child out of the crime riddled city. My daughter gave up her career for in order to find a better place for her family. The years in FL didn't get off to a good start.

In less than 2 months of arriving, my daughter found L trying to make a liaison with another young woman. Infidelity is something she will not tolerate. He fled from her anger by taking and using her credit card to buy a ticket to S.A. to be "surrounded by the love of [his] family." In short he disappeared. He left them alone in this new town with no means of support and no idea where he had gone to. (A pattern begins to emerge.) My daughter scrambled to find work and child care. She also find out where he was. When he returned, she told him to move out. Four months later, after living with another S.A. woman, my daughter filed for divorce. He disappeared again, this time to avoid divorce as that would have put the stop to his plan for a "green card."

She filed a missing person's report. When the police finally found him in L.V., he asked them "not to tell my wife where I am." Many months later he returned again. They decided for financial reasons to co-habit. This was a very bad plan. He had problems at work; didn't pay his bills; was emotionally and physically abusive. He would lock her out of the house with A'ilana inside crying. He disconnected the phone when she tried to call for help. On one occasion he locked himself and A'ilana (screaming as only a terrified baby can) in the bathroom. He finally put A'ilana out of the bathroom when my daughter tried to get in by the bathroom window. When he emerged he had shaved his head. She called the sheriff as she terrified that he had gone over the deep edge. But he's good. He told the sheriff they had been fighting over money and that he couldn't afford a haircut so he shaved his head. The sheriff left. (They hate domestic altercations). This crazyness went on for a long time until she finally convinced him to get his own apt.

During this time, my sweet A'ilana would scream blue bloody murder when he would change her diaper. She locked her knees together and tried to keep him away. She was a baby. I watched him from the doorway on one accasion as he was poking around her anus (she is screaming). When I asked what the heck he was doing, he said there "was something wrong" and that I should come see. There wasn't anything wrong except that he was, even then, touching her inappropriately. I told him to leave and finished changing her.

A'ilana has never happily gone with him. She always cried when my daughter left her with him so she could work. Once, at two years old, she ran screaming "Momma, Momma" after the car as my daughter left. My sweet baby was afraid of him. She still is.